


Criminals Keeping Me Up At Night

by rage_quitter



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Cowboy AU, M/M, based on lovenfluff's art
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 01:44:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7413709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rage_quitter/pseuds/rage_quitter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jeremy Dooley, the sheriff of a small town in U.S. territory before the turn of the century, sure has his hands full with the (unfairly attractive) criminals plaguing the town.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Criminals Keeping Me Up At Night

**Author's Note:**

> i might turn this into a series of drabbles i like this au a lot  
> based on lovenfluff's cowboy au, unrelated to the western au i posted around christmas. i dont know how to do links to stuff so check out the "ah cowboy au" tag on my tumblr blog. also please read my western au that i posted around christmas it's the only eight chapter story on my account. love u.

The soft tap of glass on wood startled Jeremy into sitting up straight on his bar stool. He tipped back his hat to look up at the bartender.

“Oh, look, you’re awake,” Geoff said with a lazy grin. “Good, I don’t need to call the doctor on you. Can’t have our sheriff passed out in a bar, right? Bad for business, yours and mine.”

“Sorry, Geoff,” Jeremy replied, accepting the drink he’d been passed. “I’m just tired as hell. Between the cougars attacking cattle and the coyotes outside town and all the damn criminals wandering around, I haven’t been able to sleep half a night.”

“Sorry to hear, buddy,” Geoff said sympathetically. He leaned on the counter to chat. At this time of day, most people were tending to fields or children or animals, running their own businesses, rather than hanging out in the bar. “Heard that crime’s gone through the roof.”

“Well, you’re lucky you ain’t been robbed yet.” Geoff scoffed a little at the silliness of hearing the slight twang in Jeremy’s distinctly Boston accent from so much time spent in the growing Western town. “There’s these four in particular who are driving me outta my mind.”

“Hey, maybe I can help. I mean, this is a bar. I’ll probably catch something in conversation, right? Tell me about ‘em.”

Jeremy rapped his fingers against the countertop for a moment and took a swig of his drink. “Okay. So there’s Mogar, first. He’s got a penchant for fire. And dynamite.”

“Yikes.”

“Yeah, yikes is right. He hasn’t killed anyone–yet–but I’ll be damned if I let him set someone’s house on fire while he’s torching barns.” Jeremy took another long drink. “Then there’s the Bull. Or the Vagabond.”

“I’ve heard of them, but… aren’t they two different people…?”

Jeremy shook his head. “I don’t think so. I think he’s the same guy with two names. The Bull, playing a mercenary, and the Vagabond, playing a robber with more guns than a man should be allowed. But I don’t know for sure, he’s a slippery bastard. Either way, I want him behind bars.”

“Might be so easy to help on that guy.”

“Yeah, I know. So then the third guy is… I don’t really know. I’m not sure that he is a ‘he,’ actually. But they’re not… hurting anyone, whoever they are. Just a general nuisance, really. Not my biggest concern, but still, they’re in the way. That one doesn’t worry me like the other three.”

“Okay. That’s three. The fourth?”

Jeremy swallowed, staring at the condensation on his glass. His mind jumped back, dragging up memories of the previous night, dimly lit by the stars and a sliver of a moon. Memories of pinning a tall, slim body to the brick wall of a house and fumbling for his handcuffs as the thief snickered and dripped words of honey from his tongue, baring his neck and shimmying slim hips. Sweet smelling, too soft blond hair; a dribble of blood from his nose where Jeremy had shoved his face into the wall, an accent he couldn’t quite place.

“Sheriff?”

“Uh. Yeah. Yeah. Right, um.” Jeremy cleared his throat and shook himself. “They call him Quick Hands. He’s a thief, a good one. Pickpocket, lockpicker, stealthy as all hell. I can’t even get a pattern on him, who he might get next. He hasn’t really hurt anyone, though, so far, but…”

“Only a matter of time?”

Jeremy nodded.

“Well, I’ll keep an eye and an ear out,” Geoff said with a twinkle in his eye. He glanced past Jeremy and it was then that Jeremy heard quiet footsteps.

A tall, slender, blond haired man took a seat beside the sheriff. Jeremy sat bolt upright, only for an expression of confusion to pass over his face.

“Hello, lads,” Gavin said cheerily, dressed to the nines as usual. A rich Englishman who refused to speak of his past, the man stood out in their town in barely organized American territory, but nonetheless easily made friends. “Lovely day.”

Geoff nodded as he fetched a drink for Gavin, obviously already knowing what he’d ask for. “Yeah, not too hot today. Thank God for that, it’s been hell the past couple weeks.”

Jeremy frowned as he stared at Gavin for a minute. Gavin turned his head towards him when the gaze tickled his neck and raised an eyebrow. “You all right, sheriff?”

“Uh… y-yeah, no, I’m fine,” Jeremy said after a second. He blinked and grabbed for his drink again.

Geoff met Gavin’s eye as he passed him a glass. “Criminals have been keeping him up at night,” the bartender explained.

Gavin gave a reassuring smile to Jeremy. “Sorry to hear that. Good luck catching your man.”

Jeremy managed something like a smile back, but felt strangled by thoughts of the masked thief in the dark alley whispering sinful requests of his handcuffs and teeth. “Yeah. Thanks, Gavin.” He downed the rest of his drink. “All right, I should head off. Try to get any information I can.” Jeremy fished for his wallet.

“No, no,” Gavin said, waving a hand. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll cover your drink, Jeremy.”

Jeremy frowned. “Are you sure?”

Gavin’s grin edged on predatory. “Of course! You work really hard, it’s the least I can do for our town’s dear sheriff.”

“I… thanks, Gav.” Jeremy stood up. “I’ll drop by later, probably, Geoff.”

Geoff nodded as he took Jeremy’s empty glass. “I’ll be here, or Jack will. I’ll let her know about the men you’re looking for when she gets back.”

“Thanks. See you around.”

As Jeremy turned, Gavin’s hand caught his wrist. Jeremy looked up from the slender fingers to his face, a little closer than he’d anticipated with the Englishman leaning down. “Be careful, Jeremy,” Gavin said, almost purring. “It’s pretty dangerous out there.”

Jeremy stared at Gavin’s frustratingly pretty face. “I will,” he said after a second of trying to collect his thoughts that had been scattered by Gavin’s bright, clever eyes.

Gavin released him and turned back to Geoff.

It wasn’t until Jeremy was outside untying his horse that he realized Gavin’s nose was swollen and he’d covered the deep bruises under his eyes with makeup.

“Oh, s _hit_.”

**Author's Note:**

> pls go follow lovenfluff on tumblr nate is the brilliant gay mind behind this au


End file.
